10 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

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10 life lessons

10 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger

I learned a big life lesson today …

I’d like to share it with you because you might find it helpful.

I went surfing this morning, here in Chile, at a new spot I have never been to before. It is a secret spot but there were 8 guys in the water since the waves were pumping and perfect.

I was quite nervous because I was the new guy on the block, just showing up and paddling out amongst them.

They all gave me a little wary look as I paddled up to them in the line up, kind of like, “who is this guy at our secret spot”.

I waited patiently in the line up, a little to the side of all of them until it was my turn. The sets started to roll in and one by one they took off on the waves. Several waves came in and everyone caught waves and was gone.

I was there by myself waiting. I turned towards the beach to see that everyone was paddling back out towards me.

I thought, “Oh please, send me a wave now while I am here by myself and no one else is here”.

Just then a big set wave came. I was pretty nervous because I knew they were all paddling back and watching and I wanted to impress. You know, catch a perfect wave in front of them all. You know, be a super star.

The wave lurched up and it was a perfect one. I paddled hard and jumped to my feet, just as I was getting to my feet I looked ahead to see if they were all watching. Right then I dug my rail and went head over heels and had a huge cartwheeling wipeout in front of them all.

When I came up I thought I could hear them laughing at me.

I slowly paddled back to the line up with my head down and kind of embarrassed.

After that I wasn’t really catching waves and I was getting kind of bummed.

Then this thought popped in my head, “Do you really care what these guys or anybody else thinks about you right now?”

I was there to have fun, doing what I love.

So, I lightened up and stopped thinking and just enjoyed being in the water.

My whole session changed. My very next wave was amazing and totally made my day. I dropped in and tucked under the curl, the view from inside out was breath taking.

The sun was shining through the green lip of the wave and it had a white glow. Inside the tube the sound changed and it sounded like I was traveling through a tunnel.

I made it out and off the wave and everything was silent again.

The rest of my session was magic. I stopped caring what the others might be thinking about me and I just had fun, laughing and smiling, hooting and cheering.

I think it was contagious because by the end of the session everyone was all smiles and I felt welcome.

I learned a big life lesson today. And that is to not care about what other people think about you.

Make a conscious decision to stop caring what other people think.

This doesn’t mean to step on people or to treat them badly. Just don’t worry about what they might be thinking about you.

The truth is that most people are thinking about themselves. You might think that they are thinking about you or judging you, when in reality they are caught up in their own thoughts about themselves and probably are worrying about what you are thinking about them.

In light of this big lesson I learned today I decided to share 10 life lessons I wished I had learned when I was younger.

Royale Scuderi is a frequent contributor to Lifehack.org. Recently she posted about 10 life lessons that she wished she knew when she was younger.

As I recently celebrated another year of life and am entering a new phase of mid-life (whatever that is) I began to contemplate the lessons that I would pass on to my younger self.

Whether you are young or young at heart, it is never too late to change — or incorporate some new (and better) practices into your daily life.

Here are some of the lessons that she has learned that we would do well to remember ourselves:

10 Life Lessons to remember …

 1.    Who cares what people think:

There is a limit to how much we should care about what people think about us. Sometimes moving forward takes a certain amount of not caring. You cannot spend too much time worrying about whether or not people respect you. You must learn to respect yourself. You need to learn that true validation can only come from within: it cannot depend on the whims of others.

 2.    Remember Today:

It is often too easy to get caught up in thinking about the past, or to become preoccupied with thinking about the future. We get so wrapped up in our minds that we do not give our full effort to where it matters most—today. You need to be fully present doing the tasks at hand so you can excel at what you are doing. The future will worry about itself as long as you remember to take care of today.

 3.    Let go:

Do not cling to wishing about how things should of turned out different. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it. You cannot go back and change the past. Make a decision to simply let it go. Move on from your past failures and regrets. Learn from them, but do not let them define you.

4.    Its Supposed to Be Hard:

Royale points out that it is called work for a reason—it is supposed to be hard. Do not expect that you can get the success that you crave without first being willing to put in the work. You must allow yourself to be disciplined by your work. Do not be afraid to put in the time that it takes to be successful.

5.    Be Your Own Biggest Fan:

Believe in yourself! It may sound like a cliché, but it really is necessary. People who rise to become successful do so because they first believed that it was possible. The power of belief cannot be overstated. If you are waiting for someone to believe in you first, then you are wasting your time. Most people get others to believe in them, directly because their belief in themselves is so strong: it becomes contagious.

 6.    Keep Your Connections:

Make sure you do not burn any bridges when you leave a company. It is easy to keep in touch; it simply takes discipline. It is as easy as sending an email every now and then to see how things are going, or a quick text. Even grabbing a cup of coffee once a year can go a long way in keeping up relations.

You never know when a former boss or colleague can become that connection that you need desperately to get things done. Most business experts call this networking. In reality it simply means being a good friend to your former coworkers.

7. Money Is Not Everything:

Although, it is important, money should never become the goal of your existence. There are more important things than a fat paycheck. It is more important to find satisfaction in whatever it is that you do. This is one thing that it takes some people making vast sums of money to realize.

Think of all of the charitable activities of people like Bill Gates and the recently deceased Steve Jobs. These two people have accumulated vast fortunes, and in the later parts of their lives they were more concerned with giving back.

8.    Be Different:

Standing out can be a scary thing. It opens us up to a lot of criticism and scrutiny. It is easy to run with the crowd, to keep the status quo, but it is not worth it. As you get older it becomes more important whether or not you gave your very best, and whether or not you were afraid to be yourself.

9.    Slow Down:

It is not a race. It is not about being first or being the best. Calm down and enjoy the ride. It is more important not to spend time comparing yourself to others, it is more important to be the best version of yourself that you can be.

10. Stay Positive:

There is good to be found in anything. Even in the most miserable of situations there is something positive to be found. Sometimes it is hard to see. However, if you can master the art of finding the blessings, when others see only a pile of trash: you will be a happier person for it. Also, the more optimistic you can become, the more the universe itself will seem to bring you success.  

Have you learned anything you wish you did years ago? Tell us about it!

10 Life Lessons source

 

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Leave a Comment

{ 22 comments… read them below or add one }

  1. Ester

    Dear Chis, Thanks for this post, it was really inspiring! I would have liked to share it on my blog but didn’t see an option for that, so i referred to your article in my blog at http://esterrose.blogspot.com/

    Reply

  2. Srinivasa Govindarajan

    The ten lessons apeared to be very useful to me. Enjoyed reading.
    Shed light on what to expect and not to expect and be rational at the same time have a smiling attitude about things around me.

    Reply

  3. sunxiaoyu

    thank you for giving me 10 messages ,i will carry it out an remember it!

    Reply

  4. Elena

    The main thing I’ve learned in life is no matter what, there are going to be some hard times in your life. No doubt about it. But what’s most important is the bounce back time it takes you to get back on your feet. You must remember that whatever you’re going through now will pass eventually and you will have to learn to move forward from there. In fact, when I’m in the midst of all the turbulence, I often repeat to myself, “this too shall pass.”
    Question is, how long does it take you to move forward? Some people never move forward and remain stuck in this dark state of mind. Wasting valuable years. Life is too short to waste any time not enjoying it. :D

    Reply

  5. Trevor

    Great post Chris.

    All my life I have always been worried about what other people think and that always impacted how I felt and what I did. I am now 40 and it is only recently that I have come to realize what other people think really doesn’t matter.

    Here’s to moving on and moving forward without the burden of other peoples supposed thoughts.

    Reply

  6. Will

    Awesome Chris, I always love reading your posts. I have been a big fan of yours ever since the early Google Cash days. You are one of the truly genuine guys online, and I always find your posts inspirational. I don’t always have the time to read all the info I get from so many sources, however your newsletters and posts are different – I always take the time to read them!

    Cheers

    Will

    Reply

  7. dennis frye

    Hey Chris,
    Really good article, I needed to be reminded of so many of these lessons. I get to wraped up in my inventions and running my web sit, colloidalsilversystems.com, that I forget to enjoy the day, I am so often in my own world trying how to make the website be successful I forget why I want the success in the first place, its all about getting the less fortunate a way to make clean and safe drinking water, and helping people with their problems, thats what important, not so much of the other junk that ways us down.
    Thanks
    Dennis

    Reply

  8. russ

    Great list Chris. Here is # 11

    11. Dont Fear – Fear is a wasted emotion. And many people fear what might happen instead of focusing on making intelligent decisions and dealing with whatever comes your way. I have spent hours with my heart in my throat worrying about what “might” happen. I dont do this anymore. I concentrate on working hard, making great decisions and building a solid business!

    Reply

  9. Steve Sux

    Great post. It is a conscious decision to see to good part and sometimes pretty hard.

    Reply

  10. Steven

    I truly enjoyed reading it!
    I respect your piece of work, thanks for all the useful posts .

    Reply

  11. Alan

    Chris,

    Have you heard about the book The Top Five Regrets of the Dying? It started out as a blog post that has been read by over 3,000,000 people.

    I think it’s right up the same alley as your post here.

    You can see the blog post here –> The Top Five Regrets of the Dying

    Alan

    Reply

  12. Daniel

    Awesome post Chris. I really enjoyed this one. Very smart points there and a great story…

    I remember one experience in my life that kind of relates to your story: Someone who had got himself into quite a bit of trouble within a social group (people were mad at him, he hadn’t been comletely honest etc…) once said something along these lines to me: “I tried to do all the right things, but I ended up doing all the wrong things.”

    If you try to please everyone around you, it seems like that tends to have the opposite effect. Funny thing…

    Reply

  13. Mike

    Chris,
    If we would reverse the time spent worrying about others and worry more of our own direction in life, it seems like many of our current societal problems could be resolved. We would have the knowledge of what is REALLY important to us in life and not aimlessly flail about try to please everyone else. I think many would find that the it would require FAR less to be happy than they think. Nice to see you enjoying life on the board. I’m waiting to be in the air!! Thanks for your post….they leave me anticipating the next.
    Mike

    Reply

  14. Chris Carpenter

    Thanks Mike! Those are great words I will try to remember and put into action.

    Reply

  15. Marvin

    Excellent lessons. Another lesson would be to get involved in the community that you live in. There are so many disadvantaged people that need help and you can do your part to make their life better. You could help raise money for a project to build a baseball park, donate your time and money to a Food Bank and the list goes on and on. You get to meet people that eventually become your friends. and that is a gift to be cherished.

    Reply

  16. Chris Carpenter

    Very good point Marvin! I need to update the list and add that. That is certainly something I have been working on the last year. Seems like as we get older we start to think more of how we can help others instead of just ourselves. No reason we can’t start on that path earlier in our lives.

    Reply

  17. Williams Y

    i don’t mean spam you bro!
    you make this “making money online or having an online business ” so much fun it is crazy!
    thanks for all your words of encouragement.
    you are like richard branson, yanik silver and micheal x.

    these are the folks that know how to enjoy life and make a living as well!

    Reply

  18. Williams Y

    Chris!
    There is a tiny video that you can attach to yourself while you are surfing. It is amazing. I forgot the name now.
    will search for you!
    that way you can record yourself each time you surf.
    waterproof of course!
    You rock man

    Reply

  19. Chris Carpenter

    Thanks for your kind words. Yes the video camera is call the “Go Pro”. I have one and have posted some videos of me surfing on the blog using that camera.

    You can see one of those videos here: http://chrisc.com/adventure

    Reply

  20. gayle

    I wish millionaires would talk more about the points between wanting money, making money and then switching to “it’s not important”.

    Reply

  21. Benny Digian

    Thanks Chris for that lessons. For me I rarely care about what people think about me and I think we should have some self confidence. It works.

    Reply

  22. Chris Carpenter

    Very true Benny! We could all do well with some self confidence.

    Reply

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