10 Life Lessons I Wish I Knew When I Was Younger
I learned a big life lesson today …
I’d like to share it with you because you might find it helpful.
I went surfing this morning, here in Chile, at a new spot I have never been to before. It is a secret spot but there were 8 guys in the water since the waves were pumping and perfect.
I was quite nervous because I was the new guy on the block, just showing up and paddling out amongst them.
They all gave me a little wary look as I paddled up to them in the line up, kind of like, “who is this guy at our secret spot”.
I waited patiently in the line up, a little to the side of all of them until it was my turn. The sets started to roll in and one by one they took off on the waves. Several waves came in and everyone caught waves and was gone.
I was there by myself waiting. I turned towards the beach to see that everyone was paddling back out towards me.
I thought, “Oh please, send me a wave now while I am here by myself and no one else is here”.
Just then a big set wave came. I was pretty nervous because I knew they were all paddling back and watching and I wanted to impress. You know, catch a perfect wave in front of them all. You know, be a super star.
The wave lurched up and it was a perfect one. I paddled hard and jumped to my feet, just as I was getting to my feet I looked ahead to see if they were all watching. Right then I dug my rail and went head over heels and had a huge cartwheeling wipeout in front of them all.
When I came up I thought I could hear them laughing at me.
I slowly paddled back to the line up with my head down and kind of embarrassed.
After that I wasn’t really catching waves and I was getting kind of bummed.
Then this thought popped in my head, “Do you really care what these guys or anybody else thinks about you right now?”
I was there to have fun, doing what I love.
So, I lightened up and stopped thinking and just enjoyed being in the water.
My whole session changed. My very next wave was amazing and totally made my day. I dropped in and tucked under the curl, the view from inside out was breath taking.
The sun was shining through the green lip of the wave and it had a white glow. Inside the tube the sound changed and it sounded like I was traveling through a tunnel.
I made it out and off the wave and everything was silent again.
The rest of my session was magic. I stopped caring what the others might be thinking about me and I just had fun, laughing and smiling, hooting and cheering.
I think it was contagious because by the end of the session everyone was all smiles and I felt welcome.
I learned a big life lesson today. And that is to not care about what other people think about you.
Make a conscious decision to stop caring what other people think.
This doesn’t mean to step on people or to treat them badly. Just don’t worry about what they might be thinking about you.
The truth is that most people are thinking about themselves. You might think that they are thinking about you or judging you, when in reality they are caught up in their own thoughts about themselves and probably are worrying about what you are thinking about them.
In light of this big lesson I learned today I decided to share 10 life lessons I wished I had learned when I was younger.
Royale Scuderi is a frequent contributor to Lifehack.org. Recently she posted about 10 life lessons that she wished she knew when she was younger.
As I recently celebrated another year of life and am entering a new phase of mid-life (whatever that is) I began to contemplate the lessons that I would pass on to my younger self.
Whether you are young or young at heart, it is never too late to change — or incorporate some new (and better) practices into your daily life.
Here are some of the lessons that she has learned that we would do well to remember ourselves:
10 Life Lessons to remember …
1. Who cares what people think:
There is a limit to how much we should care about what people think about us. Sometimes moving forward takes a certain amount of not caring. You cannot spend too much time worrying about whether or not people respect you. You must learn to respect yourself. You need to learn that true validation can only come from within: it cannot depend on the whims of others.
2. Remember Today:
It is often too easy to get caught up in thinking about the past, or to become preoccupied with thinking about the future. We get so wrapped up in our minds that we do not give our full effort to where it matters most—today. You need to be fully present doing the tasks at hand so you can excel at what you are doing. The future will worry about itself as long as you remember to take care of today.
3. Let go:
Do not cling to wishing about how things should of turned out different. There is absolutely nothing you can do about it. You cannot go back and change the past. Make a decision to simply let it go. Move on from your past failures and regrets. Learn from them, but do not let them define you.
4. Its Supposed to Be Hard:
Royale points out that it is called work for a reason—it is supposed to be hard. Do not expect that you can get the success that you crave without first being willing to put in the work. You must allow yourself to be disciplined by your work. Do not be afraid to put in the time that it takes to be successful.
5. Be Your Own Biggest Fan:
Believe in yourself! It may sound like a cliché, but it really is necessary. People who rise to become successful do so because they first believed that it was possible. The power of belief cannot be overstated. If you are waiting for someone to believe in you first, then you are wasting your time. Most people get others to believe in them, directly because their belief in themselves is so strong: it becomes contagious.
6. Keep Your Connections:
Make sure you do not burn any bridges when you leave a company. It is easy to keep in touch; it simply takes discipline. It is as easy as sending an email every now and then to see how things are going, or a quick text. Even grabbing a cup of coffee once a year can go a long way in keeping up relations.
You never know when a former boss or colleague can become that connection that you need desperately to get things done. Most business experts call this networking. In reality it simply means being a good friend to your former coworkers.
7. Money Is Not Everything:
Although, it is important, money should never become the goal of your existence. There are more important things than a fat paycheck. It is more important to find satisfaction in whatever it is that you do. This is one thing that it takes some people making vast sums of money to realize.
Think of all of the charitable activities of people like Bill Gates and the recently deceased Steve Jobs. These two people have accumulated vast fortunes, and in the later parts of their lives they were more concerned with giving back.
8. Be Different:
Standing out can be a scary thing. It opens us up to a lot of criticism and scrutiny. It is easy to run with the crowd, to keep the status quo, but it is not worth it. As you get older it becomes more important whether or not you gave your very best, and whether or not you were afraid to be yourself.
9. Slow Down:
It is not a race. It is not about being first or being the best. Calm down and enjoy the ride. It is more important not to spend time comparing yourself to others, it is more important to be the best version of yourself that you can be.
10. Stay Positive:
There is good to be found in anything. Even in the most miserable of situations there is something positive to be found. Sometimes it is hard to see. However, if you can master the art of finding the blessings, when others see only a pile of trash: you will be a happier person for it. Also, the more optimistic you can become, the more the universe itself will seem to bring you success.
Have you learned anything you wish you did years ago? Tell us about it!